


What Went Wrong?

by Trigger Finger (NatashaCole)



Category: Louden Swain RPF, Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angst, Bad date, F/M, Fluff, Implied Cheating, Swearing, implied assault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-26
Updated: 2018-09-26
Packaged: 2019-07-17 17:51:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,391
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16100735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NatashaCole/pseuds/Trigger%20Finger
Summary: After a really bad date, Reader turns to the only person who will answer his phone. Unfortunately, she and Rob have a past; a past that he hasn’t moved on from, and neither has she. A long car ride allows them to reconnect and maybe figure out where they went wrong in the first place.





	What Went Wrong?

Rob was the last person that you wanted to call. Given your current situation though, you were out of options. 

You hesitantly selected his name from your contact list and held the phone to your ear as you listened to the dial tone. Chances are, he wouldn’t even answer. You were surprised when he did though; his sleepy voice coming through the other end of the phone.

“Y/N?” He asked. “Is that you?”

“Yeah- yeah, it’s me,” you replied finally. You tried to hide the fact that you had been crying, hopeful that your voice wouldn’t give you a way. But, it came out broken and you began to sob once the words left your mouth.

“What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” You could hear the worry in his voice, and it comforted you in some strange way.

“I need some help,” you choked out. “I’m stranded and I don’t have my purse. I have no cash for a cab and I’m in a neighborhood that I don’t really know…” 

“Wait, where are you?”

You rambled off the name of the bar that you were currently standing outside of.

“I know that place,” he replied. “Stay right there, I’m coming to get you.”

He hung up and you let out a sigh as you pocketed your phone. You know you didn’t deserve to have him come to your rescue. You had been horrible to him. You were lucky that he even answered the damn phone tonight. You pulled your jacket closed, trying to warm up from the crisp winter air and you waited.

* * *

 

Just as promised, Rob found you. You watched as he pulled up in front of you, getting out of the car to walk toward you. You stood up when you were certain that it was him. 

“Fuck, Y/N,” he said as he scowled at you. “What are you doing?”

“I just need to go home,” you whispered.

He put an arm around you, leading you to his car where he helped you get in. He walked around and got back into the driver seat. He had the heat going and you were thankful to finally be warm. 

You sat in silence for some time; Rob going well out of his way to bring you home safely. You flipped the visor down and took note of how terrible you looked right now. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying so much, mascara smeared as if you were in some bad breakup movie, your hair mussed up. You frowned at yourself before closing the visor.

“You alright?” Rob asked finally.

“I’m okay,” you muttered.

“You- you were supposed to be on a date with that guy, the one you’ve been seeing” Rob pointed out. You turned to look at him, not really surprised that he paid attention to that type of thing. “It didn’t go well?”

“It didn’t go well at all,” you replied.

“Let me guess… you called him names and bailed on him?”

You stared at him, sort of hurt that he would say that, but still not surprised.

“Actually, he got a little too handsy,” you corrected him. “I’m upset because I literally had to push the guy off of me. He bailed when I put up a fight.”

You turned to stare at the window, watching the lights of the city race by as Rob drove.

“I- I didn’t know.”

“No, you didn’t. So, please stop making assumptions about me.”

There was a long silence. You, too angry and upset to talk about it anymore; Rob, probably still angry and upset with you. Regardless, he had come to help. Things like this always were his biggest downfall. It didn’t really matter what anyone did to him, he was still the guy who would drop anything to help.

“Did he hurt you?” He asked finally.

“I don’t think so,” you replied. You took a moment to assess the situation now that you were a bit more calm. “I’m pretty good at defending myself.”

“I thought the two of you were getting serious.”

“I guess he thought so too,” you chuckled. “He assumed he was owed something for taking me on so many dates.”

“What an asshole,” Rob grumbled. You looked back to him and saw that he was focused on the road. His eyes filled with a fire that you hadn’t seen before, jaw clenched tight, and hands gripping the steering wheel as if he were angry about something.

“It’s my own fault,” you reminded him. “I always fall for the jerks.”

“Yeah,” he agreed. “You really do.”

“Hey,” you began as you shifted your body toward him. “Did I ever apologize to you?”

Rob glanced over at you quickly, his demeanor changing and his anger fading. “No, you never did.”

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” he insisted. “It is what it is.”

“I never should have treated you like that,” you said.

You heard him chuckle bitterly, still keeping your eyes on him as he kept his on the road.

“Yeah, I really wish we could take it all back,” he replied.

“All of it?” You asked with a soft smile.

He darted his eyes toward you briefly. “Maybe not all of it. There were some good moments.”

“You know, the only thing I regret is that I hurt you,” you mused. “The rest of it wasn’t so bad.”

“Yeah, and why are we dredging the past up again?”

You shrugged as you turned to look out the window again. You were closer to your neighborhood, and you knew that you had a lot to say to Rob. Tonight’s events had really hit home; and you wanted to clear the air a bit, maybe resolve the tension that had built between the two of you after all this time. 

“I just realized something tonight,” you began. 

“What?” He asked. The two of you glanced at each other, making eye contact and you felt your heart race at the sight of those soft blue eyes that you had spent so much time trying to forget.

“I just- I don’t always fall for the jerks… for the record, I did fall for you once. Even after everything, you’re here. Even if I don’t deserve you, you’re the one who answered his phone tonight.”

Rob huffed in response, an amused grin pulling up on his face. If anything, he looked more upset than you felt right now.

“Is that why you called me?” He asked. “You knew that I would come running, because I always do. No matter how much you hurt me and no matter how much you lead me on; I’m the only one who comes running.”

You nodded, knowing damn well that he was right. You didn’t mean to keep doing this to him. You wanted to be able to break that connection with him, but you selfishly wanted to keep him.

“You know I only do it because I can’t let you go,” he continued. “You’re out on these shitty dates with these shitty men and all I do is sit at home and worry about you. When you do call for me to come help, I always think that it will be the moment that you finally come back to me.”

“Is that what you really want after everything?”

“I don’t know,” he mumbled. “I don’t think either of us know what we want.” 

Just as he finished his sentence, he pulled into your driveway. He parked the car, keeping it running as he waited quietly. You hesitated, sensing the tension that was alway present between the two of you.

“What went wrong with us?” He asked after a moment. You looked at him and he looked at you again. “Was I just- was I not good enough for you? Maybe if I hear you tell me that you really just didn’t love me, it would make things easier.”

“I can’t say that.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’d be lying,” you whispered. You pressed your head back against the seat, watching him as his expression became that of hurt again.

“You know I love you, right? I always did. I always will.”

“I know,” you replied.

“Then why aren’t we together?” You couldn’t be sure, but you thought you caught a glimpse of his lip trembling as if he were holding back tears.

“People break up,” you said. “They just do. Not everything is meant to last. Some people are just- not meant for each other.”

“You don’t think we were meant to be? Not even a little?”

You gave him a soft smile. It was nice to have this conversation with him right now. Neither of you were yelling or crying. Any other time, this topic was touchy and always brought out the worst in each of you. 

“Rob, how could we even know when you were never around long enough for us to find out?”

He bit his lip, staring down at at his hands that rested on the steering wheel. That was when you felt bad. You didn’t mean to say it like that, but even he understood how difficult it had been for you.

“I could do better, you know.” He glanced back up at you, those blue eyes almost pleading. You smiled at him again.

“I’m not blaming you,” you offered as you attempted to salvage his feelings. You didn’t want to make it out to be all his fault, because it really hadn’t been. Most of it had been your own insecurities. “I could have worked a lot harder too.”

“Do you ever think about trying to make it work again?” He asked as he studied your face. “With me?”

“All the time,” you smiled.

Rob reached over to you just then, placing his hand over yours that was rested on your knee. You stared down at the point of contact, wondering why the two of you had made everything so complicated.

“We still can,” he said. 

“I think we both know that’s a bad idea.”

“I don’t know, it’s been a few years. Maybe we’re different people.”

“Are we?” You chuckled. “What? We go back to trying. I remain bitter because you’re never home and I never get to see you. You continue to resent me for the mistake that I made. You hold it over my head for the rest of our lives and I retaliate by reminding you that it was your fault because you were never there.”

You saw him swallow hard, knowing damn well that the past between the two of you was difficult and painful. 

“Is that how we go on with our lives?” You continued. “We just stay together and resent each other because we love each other so much?”

“I don’t hate you for what you did,” he replied. “I did hate you for a long time, but I don’t anymore. If anything, I get it now.”

“I admit I was an idiot back then. You didn’t deserve any of that.”

“You’re still an idiot,” he pointed out. You glared at him, unsure of whether this was going to turn into another fight. “You go out with these assholes and you always get hurt. Every one of them treats you like shit and you let them. What is that?”

“Uh, that’s me trying to move on I guess.”

“Really?”

“Right, every guy that I’ve dated has one thing in common with you,” you said. “They’ve all been musicians.” 

You turned to stare out the window again, contemplating why you were still trying to fill the void that Rob had left in your life. “Funny how none of them were good guys like you.”

“So you have a type?” He chuckled.

“No,” you replied. “I was just…” you trailed off for a moment and he waited for you to finish your thought. “I just- I don’t know- that’s how I get myself into these things, I guess. I keep thinking that I can find someone like you. And I can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending that they’re you.”

You looked back at him, your own eyes welling up with tears.

“Then stop,” he breathed out. Before you could react, or say anything else, he was leaning in to you. This time, you didn’t stop him. He brushed a hand along your cheek as he pressed his mouth against yours. You knew it wasn’t the greatest idea, but you had spent a long time hating yourself over the way you had ended. Time and circumstance had been against the two of you for so long. Your mistakes had ruined things and his absence had pushed it to that point. It seemed that the two of you were destined to be apart. Every man that you attempted to date just to make yourself move on could never kiss you this way though.

You pressed back against him, telling yourself that you should stop this, but you couldn’t. You had always wanted him and he always wanted you. Yes, the two of you had made your fair share of mistakes in your relationship, but you had never taken the time to fully resolve them. Things had ended in tears and anger, and things between you had remained bitter for so long. Regardless of that, the love was still there. You knew it and he knew it. Unfortunately, you had both been too stubborn to do anything about it.

When the kiss ended, and he pressed his forehead against yours as the two of you steadied your breathing, you considered the fact that maybe the two of you had changed some. Maybe, now that you were older and aware of what it was like out there in a world without each other, maybe you could learn to appreciate what you had. 

“You shouldn’t kiss me like that, Benedict,” you smiled.

“Why not?”

“Because now I just want to keep kissing you.”

“That’s not a bad thing,” he grinned.

You smirked at him, leaning in to place a chaste kiss to his lips. When you pulled back, you looked into his eyes, wondering if he was right about it all. You were both to blame for the way things ended; but, if the two of you were willing to work on yourselves, maybe giving it another shot wasn’t a bad idea. 

  
  
  
  



End file.
